Help write John's promo on the dental office

This is all in good fun, but the dental office not giving John the surveillance footage of his car getting hit ARE BEING SERIOUS HEELS. Let’s help him write his promo against them.

“This is the late 90s X-Pac of dental offices! You got Issac Yankem working in there?”

I think he should channel his inner 1997-Bret Hart.

You know I thought that we were working together. I come here to get my teeth cleaned. I came here to get fillings. Hell, I even recommend you to family and friends. But somewhere along the line, I learned that it was all a lie. You, like all the other dentists, are just a bunch of selfish buffoons; only caring about yourself.

Back years ago, being a dentist meant something. It was a job with integrity. But now, I don’t know, the world’s just different, harder. You can claim legal rights all you want but all I see is a bunch of assholes hiding behind their paper work and desk. I’m not surprised. I’m just disappointed.

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He should arrive with a toothless agression t shirt.

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Surely this
If you were gonna give customer service an enema you’d stick the hose right here in this dentistry

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So it is a hit and run accident, why where the RCMP not called? I bet if Mr. Doright walked into said office asking for the tape they would give it up.

Get the Mounties on the case!